I have a lot to say cause I have a lot on my mind.
I think lately, the main things on my mind are:
My zit face
My weight
Adoption
First off, My zit face: The meds cause acne so my face is a mess- primarily my chin. I don't like it much at all. I will be more than thrilled to have my face be clear again. I'm still on my meds because my platelets have been dropping slightly. But I will to the dr again next week and hopefully my count will be up and I will be able to continue to get off my medicine. Which then brings my train of thought to health insurance. Blake no longer has a job sooooo no more health insurance for us. I can get Gracie on Medicaid so that is good. But my sick self, no insurance company will want me. So I assume I'll just have to wait for Blake to get another job with benefits. I don't want to stop going to the doctor cause I want to monitor my platelets so I don't end up in the hospital again- ya know...
My weight. I have nasty stretch marks- EW. I'm out of shape. I'm working out again but I get discouraged easily. I want results fast.. but I know it will take a loooong time. BLAH!!
Adoption: The end result is joyous and the best thing EVER but the journey to get a baby is stomach turning and heart wrenching. The long process of applying. The waiting for a sweet birth mother to pick us... fortunately the waiting part last time didn't take too long. It went smooth and it was really great. But I do know most times it takes a long time and I know myself, and my heart will break a little each day until I get a baby. Anyway, I don't know when we'll start the process again. We can't start until Gracie is 1 year old. But it's been on my mind. Oh also, the funds to adopt- outa this world expensive! Especially for us work-less folks. ANYWAY I'm soooo happy to have my Gracie so maybe my heart won't be so tender this time since I already have a sweet baby. But who knows....
Now that I've said all that's on my mind please don't tell me how I should feel- it won't make me feel better... Not saying you will tell me how to feel- but I just wanted to put that warning in there :)
8 Marks. Feel free to leave yours.:
I'm not telling you how to feel, I'm agreeing with you. IT IS hard to wait for the results to show from all your efforts of working out and eating well etc. I wish we could see results as soon as we are done working out, but alas, I guess that would be too easy, so good luck dear sister, good luck, I'm here to cheer you on!! GO AMANDA! :)
I think you are right, I think adopting may be easier on the heart strings the second time around since you already have your little lump of love, but I guess we won't know till we get there, ay!?
I did not know about Blake. I am so sorry cutes! It sounds like we need a girlie get-a-way for a day of window shopping or something...We miss you two, since we are right around the corner, when are we going to get together?
I hear you on the weight thing! Remember the good ole' days of Slim in Six...I miss having you to get me out of bed to work out!
I am so sorry about Blake! That really is hard. I also understand the whole frustration with trying to lose weight thing...it totally sucks. And as for the adoption thing- I feel the exact same way you do I think. Adoption is wonderful- but such a roller coaster ride at the same time. If it helps- I did have a somewhat easier time waiting for our second one to come along- because I had aa sweet little girl to take my mind off of things when it got too rough to handle. Call me and we can commiserate together!
I found ya while clicking the next blog button at the top. I had heard it would send you to blogs based on your interests. I love the St. Patty's Day theme. We adopted 2 babies. We did is through fostering. They said that our chances of getting a wellborn white newborn was slim to none. Then we got our first daughter {white, healthy, and straight from the hospital}...then the mom got pregnant again and 10 months 3 weeks after having the first one we picked up our second daughter {white, healthy, and straight from the hospital}...not an easy road, but an option for those wanting to avoid the fees of adoption.
I'm sorry about Blake lady! You should check to see if you can get cobra insurance till he gets a new job.and I feel you on the stretch marks and being out of shape! Little Ollie did a number on me.
I'm sorry things are so challenging for you two. I struggle these days myself. Most days it's all I can do to get up in the morning and face more challenges! I keep repeating to myself something Pres Hinckley said. "it's never as bad as you think it is". Something like that.
I'm just grateful you are alive and that we have sweet Gracie!! You're still sweet Amanda and we love you just the same:) keep faith burning! Something I learned during my experience doing the Ten Virgins...The oil that was used to burn in the oil lamps had to be beaten to be pure enough to burn bright. May we both be made pure by the beating we get with each trial:)
I'm so sorry Amanda! I can relate to the weight issue, and the wanting baby too, to some degree, and both are horribly frustrating and heart wrenching. Hang in there, and know that you're in our prayers. I have, and always will, admire you! You're amazing.
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